I can't say whether your H is coming around. He does seem very confused and inconsistent. Remember that in these situations feelings and emotions can shift regularly.
If you have time you can search the Archives for posts by Strong Marvellous Woman. Her husband was often away from home (may have been in the Navy, but can't recall).
What do you want? Is it your desire to work towards reconcilation? Have you found out or is there anyway to find out if he is involved in an affair? Have you been responding to any of his e-mails?
Distance is not ncessarily a bad thing. True, it makes it harder in the sense that your H cannot see any changes you are making in yourself. But it also gives you both a breathing space to think things through.
Those are my comments. I am sorry that they are not more concrete. Just quickly wanted to let you know that you are not alone.
I am not sure how mush you have been posting since I have been away from the Board but a good way to get responses is to post on other's threads and become part of a support group. I am sure you'll be getting more responses soon.
In any event, a lot more people lurk and read than post.
