Thank you for taking the time to put those things here for me.
I am trying very hard to do all those things. I have failed at some along the way, but I will not allow that to stop me from moving forward. Not on, just forward. I am discovering myself along the way, but it is very different to me.
I am attempting to implement them all in my daily life and to show him I am moving forward, not on, just forward. I am making sure that his family is aware of what goes on basically, but asking them to only tell him if they absolutely must and they have assured me that they are not speaking with him about OW at this point at all.
I have cleaned the home to what he feels is the best way to do so rather than just giving it a once over and am keeping it that way.
I have went through the EN questionairre and answered it as I felt he would answer it then one night (before I knew I shouldn't have done this) I got him talking ont he phone about it and found out where I had answered correctly and incorrectly. I also have found out from H speaking to me what he likes about OW and why she makes him feel good about himself. So I know what the draw was initially.
I have started to point out his faults in situations when he begins to point all blame to me. I have made it clear that I will not take all blame, only what is actually due to me. But I edid this in a nice calm voice with no tears in my eyes.
I have let his family and everyone else involved in our lives say or act as they will about this OW and about what he is doing. They will probably do a better job of showing him how wrong this is than I will anyhow because he is not into listening to me at this point.
I have gone basically dim at this point and am only speaking to H when I absolutely must or when I feel that he has taken the initiative to contact me several times so this time would be okay (maybe once every three or four texts).
If you have advice of that, then please offer it up. I'm open to suggestions, but I'm also having problems figuring this out on my own.
I have been married so long and was living at home before marriage....I've never been on my own, so this is TOTALLY a new territory to me. I'm not sure how to act or what to do actually, so it's a REALLY total new beginning here. So please help.
Dang, he just texted me again. He said he needs half the bedframe that we have for camping so he can use it at his mom's. Well, okay I guess. But UGH that means he has to come out here. K. Now I'm not sure how to feel about that. My stomach just went into knots!!
