Most nights things are just like they used to be. She calls or I call and S, W, and I go to dinner and everything is normal. Except the 2 days she has to herself. She sometimes comes home before S and I come home. Other times she does not come home until 10 or 11 PM. I just seems hard to detach when she is always here. The last week I have withdrawn quite a bit because I have had enough of her 2 year old behavior. So I do not IM her during the day at all. Do not call at all and I have been going to be earlier than I have been before. I just cannot sit on the couch and listen to her texting on the stinking phone. Plus this whole thing is exhausting me. So I have not gotten any hugs or kisses from her before bed in the last week, which does nnot bother me anymore. I think I finally got some detachment because I am really ready to move on. I am tired of the limbo land and ready to be happy again. I actually am considering divorce myself now. Accepting her divorce letter and moving on. I may try a little longer to DB just because she stuck with me when I was sick (depressed) and I feel that I owe her a chance to get better. Maybe something can be salvaged if she gets help. I just know I have little or no trust left. Not sure if we have a foundation of a relationship left. If not, then what can we do? Can the trust be rebuilt? Can the waals still be broken down? I just still have so many questions, no answers and little energy left to do it all. On top of all of this I have all kinds of changes and uncertainty at work and with my extended family. As if just dealing with W was not bad enough. A lot of stress, trying to stay out of the hospital.
