Just found out she already filed

[TimeHeals]

It's not juvenile to reclaim your own space and domain.

It's maybe a little reactionary to get angry in order to do it. You should do it because, gosh darn it, it is YOUR space, and your WAS gave up any and all claims to it and what you do with it when they walked out.

Make your home your personal place of power, your sanctuary. That's not a bad idea at all.

And if that means a drum set in the corner of the living room and pictures of dogs playing poker, then so be it. Whatever floats your boat.

BTW, I know this isn't going to go over well on a support forum for people trying to save their marriages (but sometimes your best chance to save something is just to let go completely, think of it as over, give yourself closure and permission to move forward with your life with or without the WAS), but it really is just a divorce.

You didn't die, come down with some horrible disfiguring illness that left you bedridden and broken. It's just divorce. It's only frightening if you make it frightening.

For now... you have permission from the whole Universe to be YOU and do what YOU want without compromising YOURSElF in order to please somebody who doesn't care about YOU.