Thanks Fud .. I get it, I guess the point was that he can be very careful with how he words things to 'avoid' having lied.
Hmm so his moral credo is something like - 'well I may be a cheater but I'm damn well no liar' - interesting!
A
Yeah, who f'ing knows how their brains work ... the day I found the texts where he was telling her he loved her I asked him if he had sex with her and he said an emphatic NO! I asked why not and he said ... wait for it ... "that would be wrong". Go figure. Geesh.
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
I guess the point was that he can be very careful with how he words things to 'avoid' having lied.
Mine says nothing to avoid implicating himself. I've been VERY impressed by how quickly he can censor himself through all of this! Guess he doesn't realize that 'lying by omission' is STILL lying.
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Yeah, who f'ing knows how their brains work ... the day I found the texts where he was telling her he loved her I asked him if he had sex with her and he said an emphatic NO! I asked why not and he said ... wait for it ... "that would be wrong". Go figure. Geesh.
My WH and OW attend bible study together every Friday night! Wonder how they're going to explain THAT to St. Peter at the Pearly Gates?! "The 6th Commandment? Uh...never saw it - my dog ate The Book of Exodus?"
Hey now...I didn't argue with Cat... she didn't show up until a little later. Or I probably would have--the whole thing had gone straight to hell by that point. lol!!
Love you Cat!!
Yeah, he is snarky... BUT that's one of the reasons I love him! A kinder, gentler Mach would be scary. And a sign of the apocalypse, I'm sure. lmao!!
formerly known as "shelbel" Me 40, stbxh 40 DSs 9, 7 & 3 M9, T10 Stbxh is a diagnosed bipolar & an addict. The end.
I'm processing a lot right now ... trying to take it all in. I am in a good place. I finally understand loving detachment and unconditional love. What a view from up here!
I've been thinking about our upcoming appt with the MC where I intend to tell H that I am moving back into the house full-time and that it is time for him to do what he's been saying he's needed all along - be independant. I am prepping myself for any response so I can't be surprised and REACTIVE, I intend to be RESPONSIVE where necessary, and I will explain my positon to him if he asks but this is non-negotiable for me at this point. I am not in love with the man H is. The old me loved me the old him, and fear and insecurity were the ties that bound for a long time ... but no more.
I am ready to be the woman God intended for me to be ... strong, capable, independant, loving, passionate, honest, true ... I am ready to take risks, make mistakes and love life as an open book. I'm facing insecurity and fear where it dwells - within me ... I'm owning my truth and am grateful for each and every experience which has led me to this place.
This is basically what I want to say to H when we are at the MC next week ...
I am ready to move forward with my own life. I am ready to be open to what ever comes my way ... open to opportunities and experiences ... I am ready to live and love and laugh ...
I want to genuinely say thank you for the growth and learning opportunity that our situation provided me over the last six months. I am truly strong, compassionate and aware, for maybe the first time in my whole life. I only hope that as time goes on you are able to find yourself the way I have, it is honestly a beautiful place to be, but a hellish hard place to find. I have learned so much about myself, and continue to learn on a daily basis ... and will for the rest of my life. I finally love me. I have a much better sense of my wants and dreams, my insecurities and fears, my truths. I will always be grateful to you for instigating the process that tore down my walls and forced me inside myself.
I thank you for loving me enough to hang on the way you did because you were right ... I would not have been ready for this journey had it happened any earlier ...
I hope you do the work, not for me, but for you ... for the clarity, the peace, the power ... there is so much freedom in knowing oneself and slaying one's dragons and monsters ... it's not an easy process, but anything worth having is always going to take hard work. I hope you find happiness, true happiness - the kind that emmanates out of your own core and feeds only on self validation and self worth.
I made a lot of mistakes. So did you. I've forgiven us and I feel lighter. I will finish grieving what is gone and look back with only fond memories.
I am excited about my future and what is in store for me.
And the really cool part???? I mean it
Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
