Talked to SIL today. She basically said that when H was living with parents (after I kicked them out and before he left there place), H was coming home late and drunk every night. He was not being accountable to his time with them either. Then SIL said awhile ago my H brought a girl to my BIL's house in the middle of a work day - they were drinking vodka out of a water bottle in the middle of a work day. She didn't know who or how long ago - or why BIL didn't tell me. His whole family thinks he's living with her and is beside themselves over what to do about. They think it might be alcoholism on top of the affair (or other way around).
There version of story is: he became a dad too early (at 23 - we had a surprise pregnancy then got married), felt pushed into a job he didn't like in order to provide for family, and naturally doesn't communicate well so sh!t hit fan when the responsibility got too heavy. They think he's depressed and this is how he's coping. That's probably true. At the same time, they are not going to enable this by giving him any money, etc.
Then H texts and wants to verify that he can pick up dd at 9 tomorrow. I waited for a bit then responded: "I need pick up time and return time. Also need the address where she will be staying and a list of other adults in residence there." Needless to say he didn't like that - flung some negative energy my way via text. His current position is that he's staying at our house whether I like it or not. My mom is coming Sunday morning - I told him this and he says he doesn't care. She can just deal with him. Whoa - he is really going off the deep end here. I'm locking down my finances and talking to a lawyer early next week.
