I failed to GAL and detach and give W space. I am only saying should I not try the less drastic approach but do it right this time?
the less drastic approach?! and what would that be? why do you want to take a less drastic approach?
Good question.
OIN, I understand your reluctance to do what you have been told, over and over, to do. I did the same thing. Here I am, six months later, still stuck and nothing has changed. Read my thread and see if you see any similarities. I tried the less drastic approach. You can see where it got me.
I am still having trouble doing what I know I need to do. I still have that fear of losing my W. The trouble is, I have already lost her. The only thing left to do is let her go. Not just a little or threaten to let her go, just do it and let her find out for herself how things will be when she gets what she says she wants. Give her what she wants, don't argue with her. She had told you numerous times and so has my W. It's past time to stop disagreeing with her.
My appt. with my L is next Wed. I'm not really looking forward to it. I'm not looking forward to spending the rest of my life waiting for a crumb or two from my W and hoping for a couple of good days a month. That is no way to live.
Dig down deep and take the approach that gives you the best chance of turning things around, gives you back control of your life and demands respect from your W. She may throw a fit, but she will have to respect the decision you made to stand up for yourself and your family.
Less drastic means "easier". Give her what she wants. Simple as that.
