I think progress is different for each person. What will take one person to get over a betrayal several years, another will bounce back in months. So, don't be too hard on yourself. I know it feels awful to be thrust aside for another woman, especially after giving so much into the marriage. Some men are just like that, and there is little one can do about it. It probably had very little to do with what you did or didn't do. You are not a failure. But, I know the feelings are there and have to be dealt with. You're doing the right thing coming to vent here. You can also just take your mind off it by reading a book, going out with a friend, or whatever you're interested in.
Know that this too shall pass ... ya just have to give it the time.
Take care.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim