All right...TM'd WW that I want her cell phone taken off my account before the end of the month so we (DD's and I) are no longer using family funds to help finance WW's affair.
Told WW that I want: "Both spouses agree to not bring people of the oppositive sex around the children for a period of no less than six (6) months for the duration of this agreement, and, should dissolution of marriage occur, for no less than a six (6) month period following the date of dissolution of marriage" added to our current TSO.
Haven't received a response back from WW regarding the above language.
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
I think I know the answer to the following question but I'll ask anyway: The next time I TM an acknowledgment to WW, should I use the pet name that OM uses for her e.g. Thanks, pet name?
I would only do it once...might be somewhat entertaining!
Sometimes I get in a rather spry mood and these things pop into my mind!
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
Had a nice TM exchange with WW strictly financial and DD logistics. I told WW that I'm taking DD's camping this weekend and WW asked where. I replied with the campground name, location and site number. Now I didn't outright invite her so I don't consider it pursuing...but I at least put the "bug" in her ear. Will she show up...I'm 99% sure she won't.
Originally Posted By: loweinsd51
Tonight during drop off I informed WW of my July 4th plans with DD's
WW: That's a holiday and we haven't discussed holiday plans yet M: It's a Sunday and that is during the weekend which I have DD's for weekends. WW: We need to discuss it M: We'll discuss it later.
I then gave each DD a hug, kiss, and I Love You then I left without so much as a glance in WW's direction.
Based on yesterday and today's TM exchange, early indications are that I will have both DD's for the 4th of July and this is without discussing the matter further.
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
Had to go to an HOA Board meeting(I'm on the board) and told WW that I would have to explain our current situation as I'm staying with family and not at the house. So I make DD a salmon burger and I turn away and DD asks who took a bite out of her salmon burger. WW responds with "I did because Dad didn't make me one" To which I looked at WW and replied "If you wanted me to make you one, all you had to do was ask"
A few minutes later: WW: What are you going to tell the board? M: I'm going to explain our situation WW: Even if that means negatively affecting DD's M: It's your mess, you are going to have to clean it up WW: This will affect DD's and their friends...we'll probably have to move from this community M: You own any negative consequences Then I walked out of the room.
WW asked me earlier if I would clean up the dog poop I originally said yes...I had to go back in the room to get something
WW: Can you clean up the poop before you back tonight? M: If it's not dark WW: Their your animals to M: You're the one who wanted this arrangement so you will have to live with the consequences.
After the board meeting I noticed some things that I gathered were outside the garage.
M: Why is all the stuff in the driveway WW: I needed to close the garage door and your being a jerk M: Real mature DD had a question so I had to walk out and WW said something.
PDT - Probably should have stopped there but...
Get out your 2 x 4's:
I went back in the room and said "I'm no longer going to clean up your mess...at some point in your life you are going to have to grow up, accept responsibility, stop blame shifting and stop playing the victim" and I walked out of the room.
To which WW replied "oh yeah I'm the immature one"...I continued walking and didn't respond to that comment. All of my responses were in a calm collected tone...never once raising my voice.
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
I got back from IC and thanks to Sandi and PDT, I've been doing the things that you've told me to do...boundaries, truth darts, and standing up for myself. My IC said that the actions and the change I've made in the last month give me the best chance for possible reconciliation. And that my actions are showing WW clarity...and if WW and I don't end up reconciling, I will still be much better off by continuing the transformation that I've started.
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
