Dazed and Confused...Need Advice!!!!

[sandi2]

Thanks, DLS. Once I stated that a WAW was "disgusted" with her H and some of the men thought I was being too harsh. But it's the truth and that's the only way to make people see how she thinks. If the majority of WAW's in an A feel anything like I did...then everything turns her off. She doesn't want to have to share the same air b/c that would mean having to be in the same room. Blunt, right? But men need to know this fact and stop chasing after a wife who can can't stand him. It is not going to change her feelings.

The LBH seems to think he can talk her into feeling differently.....but he can't. Talking makes her worse! I know there are some on the board that believe in shaming or guilting the WAW back into the R, but I disagree. Would you want to live with anyone that you were "shamed" into staying with? I wouldn't! Guilt is not a good foundation for a M, IMHO.

I'll go another step farther.....I wouldn't want a S to stay just for the children, either. Don't take me wrong, but how would a man like to know his W was staying with him for no other reason except to be there for the kids? Oh, they say that she should but a little while of living under those conditions and his tune would change. He doesn't REALLY want her there except that she wants to be with him! And that is how it "should" be, but when LBH's come here...they find every reason that she should stay in the M. They need to wake up and they need to see how it really is....not what they "think" or "feel".