Early Parole from the MLC Chain Gang?????

[MHL]

I too have developed empathy for my wife, once you detatch enough to move past the pain of their words and actions, it gets easier....bad choice of words...maybe not easier but not so tough.

My W lost a bunch of weight leading into the affair, dropped 35 pounds leading up to the affair and proceeded to lose probably another 15 pounds during the rollercoaster ride we were both on after I found out. (I dropped 70 lbs in 3 months, from stress)

Funny thing is that my W has gained back maybe 20 pounds, but seems okay with it. She doesn't seemed obsessed like she was before, not sure what it means just an observation.

I don't think that most people who first come on the boards realize the amount of time and patience it takes for all this to play out. Ultimately, improving yourself should never end, and that is what this is really about.

[irishblessings]

I agree - but the weight loss thing has come behind - mom, wife, administrator, friend, daughter....
but I absolutely know where it should actually come and how much time it takes.
I am new to the board - but, unfortunately not new to this situation!

[MHL]

Happy Little Friday to all my fellow DBer’s,

Let this be the day that you can say to yourself “Life is Good!!” today is going to be a good day!!!

Tonight I will definitely be on the patio, and I think margaritas will be the beverage of choice and I will be doing a little shrimp on the grill.

I am going to mix it up on the music tonight, little bit of the Boss, Tom Petty, Melloncamp, Fogarty & CCR, Allmon Brothers, Marshall Tucker and some others. Should be a good relaxing time.

I have much to celebrate, my D13 is rebuilding her relationship with my W and that just takes a weight off of me. It actually fills my heart with joy that my D13 is talking with my W. Lots of positive things going on there, my daughter is still vacillating between loving her mom and hating her, wanting us to reconcile and wanting us to divorce, she’s 13 so I just let her go where the wind blows her at that moment, very similar to my W. LOL

The Biggest reason to celebrate is today is the ONE year anniversary of the Bomb. 1 year ago, sitting in the same chair I am sitting in right now my W told me she was having an affair and that it had gone PA.

Reason to celebrate????

Yes

That day was the beginning of me finally growing up. I am not saying I am finished growing and I never will, however I am no longer a child.

It took another 6-7 months before I finally let go of the child in me but I did. I can laugh about it now and I don’t mind telling people that I finally grew up at the age of 42.

I think back to the way I acted, my thoughts and emotions, the way I treated my W and children. That man/child is gone forever and now I am a fully grown, emotionally and spiritually as a person who is in touch with his feelings and is not afraid to experience those feelings but man enough to not let those feelings rule me.

I told my W back in February, “I don’t want to do this again, but this is the best thing that has happened to me in my entire life.” I truly believe that.

I mark today not as the day my marriage fell apart but the day I started a journey that I hope never ends.

Happy Little Friday,

Cheers

[PEI]

Happy Little Friday and from your Canadian friend ... Happy Canada Day! Throw around a little white and red for me ... maybe a strawberry margarita ... and give a nod to your northern neighbours.

You sound like you're in a good place - I am so happy for your W and D13 ... they've got a long road ahead of them but they've started their journey .... "Life is a Highway" ...

Cheers!
Peace
PEI

[MHL]

And it is on a Little Friday!!!

IF I would have told you then, looking forward, that you would learn so much on this journey, and be thankful for it, last year...you would have told me to pound sand...

Looking back ?

Doesn't seem that long now...

Happy Little Friday to you !!!

As I was typing that this morning I was reliving, in technicolor detail every moment of that morning sitting in our kitchen at 3:30 am. The difference is that I am now removed from the emotion.....I am detached.

I am so very thankful, I would be the same dumba$$ that I was back then, controlling, being controlled, not moving forward, stagnent.

As the weeks unfolded, I remember thinking to myself "This will all be over by the time school starts" HA....little did I know....I look back at myself as if I was a different person. I laugh at the person I was, not out of cruelty but at how niave that person was, I want to go back and smack that person I was but that person is a part of me.

You have to grow from something, we all crawl before we walk and walk before we run. Being that person for the better part of my adult life was a learning experience that I can look back upon and say "this where I was, still crawling and now look at me gearing up for the marathon of life".

PEI,

HAPPY CANADA DAY !!!!!

How about a tall glass with half strawberry daiquiri and half pina colada???? Red, White ???

I have to put in O Canada on the playlist tonight. Maybe pick up a sixpack of Molson or Labatt's.....

Cheers, eh

[ericmsant2]

Hey Missher...

Happy little Friday my friend. I think I too will pick up a beverage and sit on the patio tonight. I'll toast to you.

The below quote is me to a T. I have finally grown up at the age of 40 - hey it is never too late.

That day was the beginning of me finally growing up. I am not saying I am finished growing and I never will, however I am no longer a child.

It took another 6-7 months before I finally let go of the child in me but I did. I can laugh about it now and I don’t mind telling people that I finally grew up at the age of 42.

I think back to the way I acted, my thoughts and emotions, the way I treated my W and children. That man/child is gone forever and now I am a fully grown, emotionally and spiritually as a person who is in touch with his feelings and is not afraid to experience those feelings but man enough to not let those feelings rule me.

[Truegritter]

Happy little friday!

Thanks for your post MHL, I told you we are on parallel paths didn't I?

Love what you said up there ^^^^^.

I got both you knuckleheads beat I am becoming a grown a$$ man at 44.

To celebrate I think I'll get a 44oz Old English 800 malt liquor from the 7-11 and sip it for little friday!

That ought to set things to right.

Cheers!

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Bourbon straight up.

Today IS my Friday. Our office went to 4 10 hour days to take advantage of the summer time, every other week is a 4 day weekend.

Let the record reflect: I rule.

Don't worry, I'm not holding my breathe but I will be popping some popcorn and getting my goobers ready so I can sit down and enjoy the show for the next couple of weeks.

Ohhhhh...Miss.

You don't see how gloating or being all superior can bite you in the ass yet? What you think is going to happen might but in ways you never expected? What if some new 25 year old hottie moves in and your wife realizes she is bi? The old days of the bar scences might be prefered.

Compassion rather than superiority serves you better.

[PEI]

Thanks Missher ... I'll have two daquaries and a pina colada in the middle ... we'll line them up like the Canadian flag!

Here ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjiwBwBL4Qo that's my fave Oh Canada by far!

Cheers everyone! Happy Little Friday!
PEI

[MHL]

Bourbon straight up.

Would that be Tennessee, Kentucky or the Canadian stuff?

Personally I prefer Kentucky

Knob Creek or Woodford Reserve

What if some new 25 year old hottie moves in and your wife realizes she is bi? The old days of the bar scences might be prefered.

Tell them both to move back to the house and we can all be one big happy family. LOL......JK

Actually, early on in the separation, my W suggested that I go out with the 25 year old hottie that is leaving. An attempt on my W's part to aleviate her guilt.