You bet I do. I just need a solid plan, thank you for your advice. Can you give some suggestions of what other people have used as their "or else?" And definitely the parents, the OW spouse and several people at work will be told. Everyone has suspected it for years so it probably won't be a big surprise to anyone (maybe his parents).
So far my plan is: Confront exactly as you said. Add that I want him to end this affair and commit to our marriage, or he will have to find somewhere else to live.
While he is still in the house:
1. State that no contact with Toni while physically in the house - no more IM while I am sitting in the living room with him. 2. Sleep in separate rooms 3. No alone time with the kids - I don't want them exposed to his shameful behavior. (this will kill him)
When he has moved out: 1. Kids will sleep in this house with me every night until a court orders otherwise, and a very brief visitation schedule will be worked out (also will kill him, he loves the boys) 2. Do not ever come to the house if I am not here. 3. Do not contact me, except by e-mail and only about visitation of the kids.
