Last entanglement in Paris

[sleeper]

You do not think you would be in a better place if you had taken a harder stance earlier?

I dunno. It's a good question and I am very acomplished at second guessing myself, have been as long as I can remember.

My taking a harder stance would have had no impact on X's actions, of course, but I probably would have second guessed myself to death over the possibility that taking a softer stance might have had some effect on the outcome. Financially I MIGHT have come out better, might not have and at what cost in terms of legal fees and ill will between us?

DD is a very sharp cookie with a very sweet soul. About 6 months ago she asked me why X got the better car (she totaled it), the house and the business. I was speechless for a moment at the observation she had independently made and I don't remember exactly how I responded. More recently she basically asked the same question and opined "it just doesn't seem fair." I have little doubt that the same questions and comments aren't made when DD is with X. Someone has to be the bigger person and set the example for the kids when children are involved in these situations. I feel I have accomplished that if nothing else.

The worm is beginning to turn. The kids would rather be with me than her and I believe she knows it. She is experiencing the loss of family now as evidenced by her threats of seeking full custody (over my dead body) and her missing the kids during certain holidays. She is in for more than one shock as the kids will be with me now on Christmas mornings as "our" house that I have bought from her is where they have experienced Christmas for the past 5 years and shall continue to do so. Halloween shall continue to be celebrated there as well as a big party has been a tradition.

I was a late bloomer (always appeared to be years younger than I was).

Maybe I'm a late boundary setter too.