Divorce in 1 month Help with exposing please need

[Allen A]

Cucoon didn't do all of this... she had a short secret affair and came home man...

This is my point, no matter how horrible you feel, you don't CHEAT... you still agree with that right?

[twolf]

Buy far Allen when the Wife was gone for the first four months and filed the D.

I started talking to my high scholl freind and had a Two month A and it made me feel alive again. We parted because she wanted me to figure out what i really wanted.

She was far mor appealing then the wife was at the time, butt i did not make a comitmint to her like i did my wife. I was hurt alone and needed some one to talk to she had the same thing happen to her,

So i get her husbands feelings 100%

[Allen A]

I get how her husband feels too, but I don't support how he chooses to RESPOND to those feelings.. that's all

I've been thru this last year man... OM gone since last Oct... I know how he feels and you feel.. its terrible.. but abusing your wife and flaunting a second affair in her face for a YEAR is NOT the way to handle feeling bad man.. its just not

[twolf]

Talked to son last night for 10 min asked him if he was ready to come home and see dady.

He said come home dady miss you dady.

Then 20 min later i get a text from stbxw.

Please dont say things like "come home" or "go home".
It might not be a big deal now butt eventually it will confuse him. I dont say things like that either. So i dont think you should as well!

I did not reply because i really did not know what to say.

Butt this is our home, should i of said something or just dont reply back to her.

When i do pick him yp he does say hme dady!


Allen or Sandi any Advice on how i should handle this?

[Allen A]

I am trying to think of something to say to draw this back to her infidelity...

"You think what I am SAYING to him now is confusing him? You don't think a DIVORCE IS? Who's choice is THAT? Don't lecture me about confusing children, you are doing a great job of that on your own. And its only going to get worse after the papers are signed."

Something like that...

[twolf]

Allen.... i sent that to her this morning plus i added "who's choice was it to bring O/M in sons life that is not his father, and this will allways be his home.

I like what you putt but just a little twist on it it was good.

[MrBond]

twolf,

Did you ever think that maybe you need to start switching gears? I mean you've been hammering away at her affair and how she's committed adultery, etc. and all it seems to have done is make things way more difficult.

Maybe you need to stop obsessing about the A portion and start doing things for yourself.

[twolf]

Ok she texted me back.

If it makes you feel better to blame me then go ahead.
Would you rather of me stayed and had an unhappy life?

How would that made you feel that some ones life is miserbal beacause of you?

All I was sugessting was not to say was say things like that.

Accept that we are not a family anymore and make the best of it.

No one is trying to replace you as a father!

Stop with your ridiculas theories of me trying to ruin yor relationship with our son.


Allen........ how do i rple to this??

[twolf]

MR Bond if done lots of things for my self.

[MrBond]

Then maybe you need to peel away from the accusing portion of the A. I mean you know it's going on. You've been slamming her with that fact in every interaction and all it's been doing is strengthened the wall she's built up.

Maybe try bring nice and see if that shakes her up. Just thinking of something different to try since things haven't changed in your sitch.