I am so glad you shared your story! I've shared on other threads that with my first marriage, the same kind of thing happened. After the divorce and my GAL, H wanted to reconcile and was furious when I would not. One day it just snapped and I was over him. Now, as I've mentioned, it was easier for me then because we had been married for less than 2 years (but together almost 7) and no kids. With my current sitch, much harder going on 20 years and 3 kids!
I believe it when you say though that one must make changes for the benefit of him/herself (and kids) and not just to win the spouse back. It's funny how when you respect yourself, you give your WS a reason to respect you as well!
