And just to be clear, your first paragraph sounds like a 16 year old boy that has watched too much porn.
Well, in some ways, that's true! I have about the same sexual experience as a 16-year-old when it comes to pleasuring a woman (my wife never let me). Never seen a woman have an orgasm. Have resorted to less interesting substitutes (like porn) just to hold things over. Have lots of fantasies about sex with women I know. And I've always had about the same sex drive and function as I had at 16. So, yes, you are right on target.
Yeah, and for all those women out there who have trouble with their husbands being into porn, here's a guy who's never had the problem of preferring porn to their wife. And, OF COURSE, I end up with the wife who wants no sex with her husband and tries to distract him by buying Playboy calendars. Somebody up there in the sky must be having a hearty laugh!
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There are moments in a couples' life when it will be that hot and steamy, and then other things will intrude and the taxes will have to be done, and the laundry, and the kids are crying, and she's tired, or you are, or any number of reasons.
I've been through all of those negatives -- every one of them -- and they didn't reduce my sex drive one tiny bit. That's often the difference between men and women. For example, I can think of nothing better than taking a sex break between doing the Federal and State taxes, especially if it's right on top of the desk and the tax forms -- and let the tax authorities wonder about the stains.
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Have you tried romancing your wife with absolutely no expectations of sex at all? Are you a couple in all other respects? Do you spend time together? Do you share interests? Do you have nearly separate lives, friendships, etc. There is so much that goes into desire. Has she been to the doctor? Does she consider it no problem?? Can you talk to her about this or does she shut you down?
Yes to all the positives, no to all the negatives except she does not consider it a major problem, and she doesn't want to talk about it in depth.
