1. What do I say to people who ask what is going on? That H left or that WE separated?
I usually say that we are separated. If they say they're sorry to hear that -- and most do -- I say that I am, too, sometimes adding that it was not my decision (since H has told some of his friends that it was his decision). If they probe for more, the most I say is that it looks like a MLC to me.
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2. Is it "normal" when going through this to "exit" the social scene for a while? I don't feel secure enough that I won't break down in public.
Very normal. I STILL, after more than 18 months, choose carefully where I go and when. I'm no longer fearful of running into friends with questions, but I do NOT want to run into H with OW. I don't trust myself with that situation yet, but I'm getting there.
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3. I am still having trouble determining what to tell my kids.
My grown Ds knew immediately because H emailed them when he left. I think I would just answer their questions as they come up, honestly, but with as much compassion and forgiveness as you can muster. My Ds know that I would never lie to them, and they asked some very pointed questions that were difficult to answer in the way I'm suggesting, but I did my best.
Hang in there, Irish. You're really doing very well. It does get easier. Really.
(((Irish)))
M 65 H 64 T 39 & M 36 @ S 12/08 Two Ds
Do you know that the harder thing to do and the right thing to do are usually the same thing? Nothing that has meaning is easy. ~ The Weather Man
