Just Confronted - A Litttle Confused

[Quicksilver264]

I get what you are saying Allen. But what I got from DR in detachment while still living together, is to treat them sort of like a roommate you moderately like.

All I was doing was being polite when she asked me what my July 4th plans were. I said "XXXXXXX". Moment of awkward silence and a strange look on her face. "Well, you are welcome to come down with me...."

Her: "Oh no thanks".
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Anyway, I had another question. I was thinking about certain tactics that are used to give away information that is desired to be known BUT WITHOUT leading on you WANT them to know.

I am getting she still THINKS I am trying to "save" the Marriage. I am NOT. The OLD MARRIAGE is over, and I'd like the opportunity to build a NEW one. However, I do have to prepare for the eventuality that this won't work. She I gather is thinking I am just burying my head in the sand about it. That is one of her "Oh I know him so well" things.

So for a 180, I was thinking of doing some more real homework on apartments, new jobs, and many other different things. Maybe print out an email or two I have sent looking for houses.

Leave it laying on the kitchen table with the very top paper being this real email I got about a potential STEAL of a condo 15 miles away.

Basically I want to make it look like I left in a hurry to go see it (which actually I REALLY do in all honesty), and left everything there. I want her to SEE how seriously I am taking this, and how prepared I am to move on should she keep all this up.

We have to live together because of finances, but I found out in my state a spouse can leave the house during a separation, and NO LONGER be financially responsible for the mortgage. I want her to taste the full weight of the consequences of her actions, and be ready to accept that in 6 weeks I may have a nice, CHEAPER place to live where she will be out of my life.

Like you said Allen, the gravity of the divorce probably hasn't FULLY sunk in, and I'd like to to a 180 and let her feel the gravity at the same time.

NOW THIS IS JUST AN IDEA I AM THROWING OUT. I wanted some opinions, so don't think I am going to just do this. Any advice is appreciated.