help with a plan

[pigskin]

It's an easy gig for her. No pressure to leave, husband takes the kids when she has plans. If I were her I'd ride that as long as I could.

The question is do you want this existence? If you are cool with it, then fine. If not, I don't see any actions to further you along to where you want to be. You say she has told you she doesn't want to work on the marriage. So your current state will continue indefinitely unless some action is taken.

I'm not trying to apply any pressure, because if you are stress free in this environment and don't mind living like you are, then by all means continue. It's not a marriage, but it could be a lot worse.

However you have said many times you wish she would leave. She has no reason to. I'm just trying to ascertain what you really want.