W has filed for D and our “Temporary Hearing”, where the court decides living arrangements, visitation, who pays what, is on July 13th. How do we handle finances between now and then? We each have our own accounts now, although I am still on hers, so I could clean it out if I wanted to, but I won’t. W only works part time, so I make about 5 times what she does. I got paid on Friday and she said today that she needed $ for groceries and asked if I wanted to get cash to pay the sitter. I said, not really, do you want to pay the sitter? She said, what? Do I have to pay the sitter every week? I said I don’t know, I just paid $8k worth of bills. She said she was broke from taking the kids to movies and buying groceries. Asked me for $ to buy groceries. I said, give me the list. I will do the shopping.
Do I tell her I think we should go halves? That is not what the court will likely say, but she is working part-time and spending all kinds of $ on entertainment. She went out drinking the last two weekends, took the kids and friends to the beach on Friday, which cost $, then took the kids and friends to movies and paid for everyone again. The she complained how expensive it was. Now she is going to take the kids to the beach again tomorrow. She is off ½ day on Thursday and all day on Monday and Friday. Her off says consist of sleeping in, exercising, going to the beach or the movies, laying out, doing housework and cooking for the kids. Most of the time, I don’t even get dinner. She has a pretty tough life. I told her she needs to go back to work full-time, but she said she couldn’t because there are no full-time positions available and she needs to “be there” for the kids. I told her we both need to be there for the kids. My attorney said she should have to get a part-time job if she can’t find a full-time position. I hope the judge agrees. She has a 4-year degree and the same job for 20 years, while I have taken 8 promotions to earn more for our family. She didn’t want to have to deal with the “politics” or the aggravation of having people report to her. Wish I could do that. This is one of the decisions we made together for her, and I never held it against her, until now. Look where it got me. Would you say I am bitter? The court says they assign child support and alimony/maintenance payments based on earning potential. I am going to have my attorney argue that she should not only have a full-time job, but a supervisory position, which earns more, because she has 20 years experience. She doesn’t need maintenance. Take care of yourself!!!! I shouldn’t have to finance her week-end drinking binges, should I?
Anyway, if you guys could let me know how you handled similar situations, I would appreciate it.
