Wait, Mrs. A--where you live, if you don't want the D, then you can stop it?

But I see your point. Let me know if I am understanding correctly. If you are the one who stops it, but your H still wants it, then what is the point? Like HE needs to be the one to come to that conclusion?

I mean I was thinking along the lines of "set them free, if they want you, they'll return" when I just pushed stbxh to OW and then dropped my pursuit of D last year. I mean I was thinking "if he chooses me out of obligation, I will live with a resentful, unhappy man who won't show me affection or give me the love I need and deserve, no matter how hard I try. I want him to WANT to come back so that he will be motivated and put in the effort to rebuild our marriage."

Although....interesting...IF he is divorcing me out of "obligation" to OW...then he will resent her, right?


me,34
exH,34
S,16 months
S:3/31/09-left for OW
started DBing 10/09
d final: sometime 10/10
current:
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1
met in 2004