This will be quick. I gotta get to Costco before it becomes a madhouse. My nephew is flying in today!!! He is 16 and always hungry!
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So I wanted him to actually feel the consequences of his decision.
That is emotional and not what is best, I know.
They were all fine reasons at the time.
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I have his grandma's number- she wanted me to take S down to visit them but they live 5 hours away. I haven't called her back.
Sounds like a road trip to me!! Get on the phone and plan it today. I assume there is other fun stuff to do with a 1yo there? Photo ops for his 1 year portrait? all kinds of reasons to do it!
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And stbxh has been living with OW since April of 2009 but I guess the difference is that he got to live far away from his family and me so maybe it was not realistic.
Did he have a sham apt, too?
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Oh and I guess the other reason why I didn't tell him again that I wanted to save our marriage is that I am tired of being the one who is trying to convince him. I am tird of being the only one who is FIGHTING for this family. I want him to want it.
It is exhausting. As far as him wanting it? See distorted thinking patterns! Joni Mitchell (a singer for you youngins') said you don't know what you've got til it's gone. (Paved paradise and put up a parking lot) Great...now that'll be stuck in my head all day!
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Not that any of the reasons why I didn't fight more or plead or beg are "right." I am just saying that's why.
Now you know, begging and pleading is never good. How would you speak to a teenager who is hell-bent on making a huge mistake in their life? This approach seems to get-through to my H (but not immediately...I plant seeds, ask rhetorical questions,etc) Days, weeks, sometimes months later, he comes up with these amazing thoughts/ideas.
Write H another letter. (don't send it! and don't read the other one you wrote til after) See what comes out.
TTYL
"If you strike me down, I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!" 1st thread
