1. Don't tell him how you feel.. tha'ts hwat he wants to hear... It gives him his emotional connection... It's like sex.. you tell him how you feel, so he's done for the evening and can head out the door. 2. Don't thank him for offering to arrange sitting for your daughter when he's using his mother to cheat on his family...
HUSBAND : If we get divorced --
YOU : If we get divorced is it... There is no more WE after that so end the sentence RIGHT THERE... GO away please
HUSBAND : This winter "we" should do -- YOU : I have no intention of doign anything with someone who's disrespecting their family and doens't care ... Go away please...
HUSBAND : We need to go to that movie when it comes out.. YOU : I have no intention of doign anything with someone who's disrespecting their family and doens't care ... Go away please...
You need to STOP letting him casually interact with you.. when he tries to make small talk or interact at all you CUT HIM OFF adn tell him he's disrespecting his family and to go away.. if he refuses YOU go away instead.
HUSBAND : I'm going out tonight, if that's ok with you? YOU : Disrespecting your family and embarassing your daughter? ... GO AWAY please
Just end the exchange.. He's TRYIGN to get you worked up so he gets an emotional exchange from you... so you just tell him he's being disrespectful and walk away
You want to shift the focus from how YOU FEEL to HOW DISRESPECTFUL he is... and then you walk away...
Pinpoint the disrespectful behaviour and EXIT the conversation.
That's it, you keep that pattern up with every exchange
You don't tell him how horrible his behaviour makes you feel... that's gonig to make him feel BETTER... because you are offering him an emotional exchange...
You tell him his behaviour is disrespectful and move AWAY from him as if he has a disease... MOVE AWAY physically
