I too have developed empathy for my wife, once you detatch enough to move past the pain of their words and actions, it gets easier....bad choice of words...maybe not easier but not so tough.
My W lost a bunch of weight leading into the affair, dropped 35 pounds leading up to the affair and proceeded to lose probably another 15 pounds during the rollercoaster ride we were both on after I found out. (I dropped 70 lbs in 3 months, from stress)
Funny thing is that my W has gained back maybe 20 pounds, but seems okay with it. She doesn't seemed obsessed like she was before, not sure what it means just an observation.
I don't think that most people who first come on the boards realize the amount of time and patience it takes for all this to play out. Ultimately, improving yourself should never end, and that is what this is really about.
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
