Scwred up and need advice

[CPCajun]

an Update from last night...

Last night I was playing the Wii with the kids. W sent several text, which I seen but was going to wait to answer. Since I didn't immediately answer, she started calling. First my phone, then the house phone, over and over. I decided to pick up a few calls.

I asked if something was wrong. She said ,no but wanted to talk. I started to discuss her trip and if she was having a good time. She changed the subject about M. She said scared to leave but scared to accept me back. She was hurt all these years and wants us to be a family again, but does not know what to do. I explained to her, what happened in the past happened, it cannot be changed. You and must look to the future and take it one day at a time.I tried to change the subtly change the subject, but she kept going back to M. She kept telling me how I did "this and that". I agreed to it as those things are what I have done and that these things are what I am working on. I must work on myself in order for W to accept me back.

I told her that I do not want to rush this and time will let us know when we should get back together. She said she didn't want the D now but doesn't know what to do. I told her that since you served me, I will have to get a L and let your L and mine work these issues out. She its just a court date pushing this along and a L is not needed. I said that is not true. If I show up to court not represented, I cannot protect myself, your L is on your side and will do everything to make this benefit you. She started crying and stated she does not know if she made the right choice in filing D. I said it was her choice what you do I cannot change it, but I will proceed in getting a L and going to court.
She started crying more on how she wants this to work out. By this time, my youngest came out wanting to know what is taking so long and wants to play. I told W that it is Ok and what happens happens, I am willing to move forward one way or the other. Have a goodnight and have fun tomorrow at the horse event.