Does DB'ing work if OW is playing the victim?!?!

[sandi2]

It would probably help if you stuck to one thread a while longer before starting so many.

What are the ages of you & H?

The OW is not your friend. She is the enemy and she doesn't want your M to work out.

H then got quite upset and said OW wants very much for our M to work and she is miserable as she is torn between her love for him and wanting to give it up for our M!!!

This is insane. She is having an A with your H.

The more you pursue him, the harder he will resist you.

So i decided to stop hiding my hurt and grief but stop short of begging and pleading. When he tried to bring up the subject of the duration of my stay last night, I started talking about how depressed I feel about not having a job and the difficulties i've had trying to secure a job, and that i'm feeling really alone now that he wants to leave me. And I didn't fight back my tears as i've been doing. This seemed to stop him from talking about my stay.

This is not attractive to a man! Men are attracted to women who are self-confident, spunky, show self-respect, and who don't pursue.

I said to H i'd cut off my arm if that would bring him back to me. H was speechless after i said that.

This is not the way to get through to him! It is desparate, needy, whiny, clingy......all that mess is disgusting to him. He didn't say anything b/c he was probably sick. Please stop this type of tactics.

Have you read the DR book yet? There are several chapters from Michele's books here on the different forums.

BTW, the reason your H keeps wanting to know how long it will be until you leave the house is b/c that was his & OW's love nest while you were gone. Now you're back and it interfers with their routine.

How badly do you want to stay M to a man that would treat you this badly? It's important to know if you can handle it b/c if you stick it out....it will be extremly hard work.