SillyOld, he hasn't described the lack of sex as "hurtful". He says he doesn't like it. I'm just not 100% sure I believe him. I can't help thinking, if he *really* wanted it, and if it *really* mattered to him, he would go for it!
I think he does love me, in that weird way that LD people can love.
......But feeling like he just doesn't care whether we have sex or not...that really hurts.
One of the things that really surprised me was how much both my LD wife and I were hurt by our lack of sex together and how happier we both are now that we are having sex two to three times a week. We are both happier, which has stunned my LD wife, beyond words.
Even though I am the HD person in our marriage, there was a point where I totally gave up on having sex with my wife because I could no longer stand the emotional pain that always accompanied sex with her. It just wasn't worth the pain no matter how much I wanted to have sex. You might want to do some introspection on who is suffering from your lack of sex and imagine that it might be both you and your husband (but for significantly different reasons).
According to your post he says he doesn't like the lack of sex. You might want to find out what it is that he doesn't like or how it makes him feel. Ego's are pretty complex things that can be easily damaged.
Yes to the 5 Languages of Love and making your partner feel loved in their primary and secondary language of love! After they feel loved, if you are lucky, they might just figure out that you to need to be loved in your (not their) languages of love. If that happens you will likely become one happy person.
good luck to you.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
