Thanks all! Appreciate the support. Several good days followed by one not-so-good day threw me. Thanks for "righting my ship"!
I think you're right about this being about OW. Things are winding down between them, but he's still her advisor, he still has to coach her through finishing her dissertation and defense. The stress is starting to show.
Gee, if he'd only gotten rid of her 2 YEARS AGO like I told him to, he wouldn't have NEAR so many problems!
That said, he's been MUCH better tonight. Home early, had dinner with all of us, had me come down to basement and spend 30 minutes looking at his fish tanks and other fish he'd like to buy online. Even mentioned that he'd transferred more money to household account, which I hadn't asked him to do.
LOL!
His university account password, the one I used to use to go into and check on pay stubs and insurance reimbursements, was Nm;nhl, which stood for "No money, no honey love." Does he REALLY think that's the problem? <sigh> Banish OW, return to our marriage, and start acting like a man again. The money is minor compared to all the other stuff.
Originally Posted By: Allen A
I do'nt think teh you smell nice comment was a tactical error...
If you say that and WALK AWAY then its a home run... if you say that and hang on his space like a chimp then yes its pursuit and not helpful at all...
I was trying to sleep and he was walking out the door to a meeting. But I'll keep your strategy in mind!
Originally Posted By: Allen A
After three years the bickering IS gonig to happen... The unicorns and rainbows are very likley long gone by now and its getting serious... And netiher one of them has the maturity to work through that to anything resembling a long term commitment... its giong to blow up like a storm.. Just keep your distance...
In Larry's version of Dbing, you "go dark" for the most part but when you do have interactions, you keep them short and sweet. Nothing serious or difficult. Just "unicorns and rainbows" (to quote a friend) - but with ME instead of her. So guess who gets the brunt of his frustration and nastiness? HER! It speeds up the end of the affair and makes home seem like a refuge.
I'm seeing that off and on. But I've been on this roller coaster for nearly 2 years now and am getting kind of tired of the scenery. Ready for a smoother, more pleasant ride...
