No going back....

[Jack_Three_Beans]

I dont know if this is true, but it seems to sit right.

It's pretty accurate. ANY child that had emotional trauma and was unable as a child to deal with it is poised to have an MLC later. That is my opinion but I am not a professional.

As the resentment build, and as he strted spending more time away from home, my affection for him dwindled, in and out the bedroom. This was one of the things he told me he was unhappy about when he left - he was always initiating sex. I told him that it was becasue he had distanced himself emotionally, and he said , but dont you want to have sex just for sex? I mean really That just hurt.

tip toe through the tulips...

As a guy I understand this point of view from your H. And I'll be blunt here. Pick up The Sex Starved Marriage by Michele Weiner Davis. And sometimes sex is just sex...when your are married and you like sex...you kind of are (morally) allowed to do something you REALLY like ONLY with your spouse.

What if they didn't? Or where...punishing you?

Now you get to fly solo or...

The book is much better at explaining this.

He made his own mistakes too.

Uh-huh...but YOU are here. You can control exactly ONE person...and that is you. You can for arguments sake control your son a little while longer but not once their sense of SELF grows bigger.

So you can control you so we work on you. Not him. Of course HE made mistakes..and you are allowed to vent and biotch about them here, but no one here is going to tell you how to fix or correct those...because that is up to him once he realizes it. Once HE realzies it...not having them pointed out to him.

Thing is - I dont think there is one here.

Some answers are to be found...but mostly truths. And one of those truths is that some questions you'll find you do not need answers to. The questions lose thier importance to you.


Welcome to the best worst place to be pie.