We have just accepted an offer on the house. He made a counter offer in settlement to my soliciters proposal and I agreed to it. Settlement is ok- I think its fair- but Ill struggle to buy a house.He seems upbeat- has called me twice in last 2 days to ask which remaining things I want and what he can throw away. Considerate of him to bother- I dont contact him and he could have just got rid of everything. Keeps saying" I think about you every day" Im afraid when I talk to him I forget all divorce busting principles and end up saying things I shouldnt. For example " I hope we will still see each other" " I suppose I should send the divorce absolute form off now I dont want to" and "if you are ever homeless you can stay here" After I put down the phone I hate my needy weakness.Truth is I still care so much after 3 years separation. He is clearly still mixed up-he recently lost both his parents and is now applyng for jobs after being out of work for a year so his life is as uncertain as mine. I have lost the feelings of despair and panic but I dont think I will ever really get over this. Strange, all the long stretches of months,nearly years, when I heard nothing from him I felt calmer. Recent events have made this divorce real although we are more in contact.I am certain of two things. Right now he has no thoughts of a reconciliation;and he is afraid that I end up hating him and stop all contact as I always said I would as soon as we divorced.
