hm, I'm sorry you had such a bad night and are having a difficult time of things in general right now.
You are definitely an official mother of a full-blown adolescent now! Fourteen. My StepD - my first daughter - was fourteen when I married her mom. Yikes! Gardener had stepped into a scary teenaged-girl-world!
She is conflicted, in pain and very confused.
And your night last night is so full of metaphors that one could stretch them forever:
She goes to a place where everything seems - to her, right now - perfect, intact, working, family-like, and full of abundance.
Comes home to things that don't work ("DVD"), things are not affordable right now, nothing seems intact - including family - and she feels the tension, the incongruity of the two situations.
Then something shattered, which is how she probably feels about everything right now.
All Hell understandably broke loose. All Hell has broken loose in her life and in her adolescent black-or-white thinking nothing is right in her life.
Teenage angst. Very real. Very scary. Very final. (remember? )
I don't know exactly how hysterical she was, but next time perhaps try hugging her. Tightly. Lovingly. Restrain and comfort her. Cry with her, not separately. And don't let go until she - and you - calm down.
Tough time and stress all around. And for her, at a very tough age.
Give yourself a good day today.
See you on the .alt.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac