Early Parole from the MLC Chain Gang?????

[MHL]

Just got home a little while ago with my D13. D13 and S9 went with mom to the movies tonight, S9 went with my W to spend the night. When I dropped the kids with my W my D13 was quiet and uptight, I did not talk about it with her just dropped them off and told them to have a good time. BTW when my W pulled up she was all smiles, looking like her old self.

When I met them to pick up my D13, she was sitting in the backseat and leaned forward to hug her mother also when we were all saying our goodbyes, my W said to our D13....

"D, I love you"
our D13 replied "Love you too, Mom".

I made sure to look my W in the eyes and say goodnite myself to her and she smiled her old big smile back at me. Everyone is happy, I thought to myself.

When my D13 and I got back in the car I wanted so bad to ask her how it went but I fought the urge. This has to be between my W and our D13.

Part of my journey and part of my growth has been to learn that I talk to much, I try to control the sitch, control what others feel based on what I "think" they should feel. That has stopped.

Sooooo, my D13 and I were riding back to the house and I did not say a thing, just waited to see if my D13 would say anything, it only took about 2 minutes and she started to talk about how she felt. I just shut up and listened, I did not offer any opinions or advice, I just listened. The more I listened the more she talked. (I wonder if this would work on my W....DUH)

My D13 talked about how she was uneasy at first but slowly she felt more comfortable around her Mom, and how she had a really good time and wants to do other things with her. My D13 was not ready to spend the night with my W but wants to go do "girly" things with her like go shopping and get thier nails done.

Hey you guys with the pink Tu Tu's may want to join them....LMAO.

My daughter for the first time in over 9 months was talking about her Mom and smiling. Thank you Lord !!!! Talk about letting go and letting Him take over.

One of the last things my D13 said before we got home is that she thought that "Mom was acting like her old self again, not like she was 9 months ago". This is the only point I made and I kept it simple.

I said, "D you need to be patient with your Mom, ultimately you can not control what she does, I know you have expectations of your mother, please try not to get upset if she does something that you don't like. If it does happen it is okay to tell her how you feel when she does something but getting upset and losing control only hurts you and what you ultimately want."

Big stuff for a 13 year old but I think she understands, I don't know if they planned anything else but I am going to back way off and let thier relationship rebuild. I know I will be the last one for my W to reconnect with and I have waited this long.....I am just going to focus on me and give my W and D13 lots of space.