The thing is OPTI, as pup said you need to make some hard decisions about how you want to attack this... pup and I almost always reccomend addressing the infidelity, the ADDICTION first... not the underlying marital problems...
Read the Holes in the Roof article above.. Penny explains it much better than I can...
You need to decide if you agree with Penny above, or if you think being nice and waiting this out is going to solve this problem long term. Many spouses try the act nice and they get a MUCH MORE PLEASANT ACCICT in the home, and they think "hey things are getting better.." a year later they are miserable becuase their spouse is STILL cheating and THEY suddently realize they are being taken for a PAINFUL RIDE down DOORMAT LANE...
Its up to you Opti... tough choices I know... been there.. I did the mr nice guy for over a year before I started to play hard ball... I wasted a YEAR aiming my guns in the wrong direction...
