She responded that she doesn't know what my problem is and she isn't "with" anyone so I should stop feeling so betrayed. I should be a man and take some of the blame.
You have taken some of the blame, right?
You have to listen to Puppy and others here. I'm no expert, but my W has said the exact same thing. "You didn't support me being on the SB or coaching, or whatever." They will always have some excuse. My W has admitted to a friendship that I find unacceptable. As Puppy points out, it is probably more than that. Don't let self doubt cripple you. It has happened to me as I start wondering if I am reading this whole thing the wrong way.
If she has a relationship that you are uncomfortable with and she won't stop it, that should tell you all you need to know. You and your family aren't as important as her "friend".
