Point taken. His last MLC 8 years ago at age 41, he never really 'left'. He came and went and came and went, and when he was home he was drinking and being ugly to me. This went on for most of a year and then he just snapped out of it, but I don't think he ever really got over it. I have a friend who suggested that all the emotions that I had clamped down on came boiling up when we talked on Friday, and that is why I was a wreck for 3 straight days.
Can you see the focus on HIM, and US in there ?
You can search for these answers forever, in the end, the answers INSIDE of YOU,are the only ones that will matter.
You have to flip that focus to start healing...
Originally Posted By: punkin
I want to stand for this marriage. I do not want a divorce. No matter what EVERYONE ELSE says.
Then that is what you should do...you just need to understand how
Originally Posted By: punkin
Do I deserve better? Hell yes, but he is capable of BEING BETTER. Regardless of how he is acting now, I know inside he is a decent, loving individual - with a trainload of baggage. For the moment, this is the best I can do, and I'll give it my all.
Let's play pin the blame on the MLCer....
Its easy to become the " Martyr" right now, and I will tell you that you are heading down the road to Bittertown....
From what I read, you're a country girl Punkin...
Ever ride a bicycle down an old one lane dirt road, that has tire ruts on each side ?
Ever get in one of those ruts, and cannot get the bike out of it ?
The harder you fight to get out, the more it fights you to stay in ?
And unless you are careful, you will end up in the ditch, when it throws you off.
Right now, that rut is your marriage, and you are trying to navigate through it without it throwing you off...
The more you fight what is around you, the harder it will be for you to get through without a skinned knee.
Stop the bike Punkin....
There is NOTHING you can do to change the events that have to play out in his head....
Channel that focus on you for now, so that you can find who you are.
