I feel like I am talking to the wind here - but it helps anyway! I call H tonight to let him know that he is "losing" S - not good interactions. H says that he knows but that "he does not want to be with me!!!!!!!!"
Guilt will push him further away. I'm sure he feels bad about having his relationship with his son slip away. Does he handle it correctly? No, not yet. Let him feel this loss on his own. He doesn't need any reminders from you.
Let him repair that relationship on his own as well. Your son is old enough for this. Keep quiet and do your best not to speak negatively about his father in front of him.
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I said - I am clear on that. In fact - I actually say " I am clear on that "Joe" (fake name used on phone chat line) - "43 years old" - To which H says "I am hanging up" which he does!
Seriously? What are you trying to accomplish with this? I'm not surprised he hung up.
The man has promblems, serious ones. Two wrongs don't make a right. Disrespecting him isn't going to get you very far.
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OK - so friends help me - do you validate an MLCs "reality"? I realize that he is pissed right now
Well sure he is. You intentionally pissed him off. Why? How is that going to help. I understand he has hurt you but stooping to his level isn't the way to get through this.
You don't have to validate poor behavior but it isn't an excuses to be disrespectful either. Throwing gas on this fire isn't very wise.
How can you express all your worries about your son and his father and then turn around and intentionally say or do something to make matters worse?