Had another rough weekend. I am beginning to dread even going home. Sat. W decided to go move a friend. I was emotionless when she told me. I was just like, OK. So I took my S to car show and we got home late, about 11PM. Just getting him settled down when W gets home around 12. She did however say that she missed all her guys (Me, S and 2 male dogs) Sunday fathers day. No card no gift no nothing. Only after her dad said that he was busy and only had a 2 hour window to spend with his 2 daughters and 3 grandchildren (SO INCREDIBLY SAD BTW) that she said forget it and asked what I wanted to do. the only thing I could get her to agree to was dinner. We went to a nice restaurant but that was the extent of my day. On Mothers day I got her a $100 trellice and a card from our S. I got NOTHING. Should I mention it? It really hurt my feelings. She did have S tell me Happy Fathers Day. I just hate my life right now.
Getting harder and harder to be happy while I am at home with her. I just want to scream WhAT THE F&*# IS YOUR PROBLEM????? Not to mention all through dinner and all night long she was on Facebook on her f%^$#&$ phone. Thatjust infuriates me. If you do not want to be with your family get the F out!!!! SO RUDE!!!! But at least she knows what all her friends are doing. Now that S is in bed and she is sitting on the couch over her, she finally is not on Facebook. Should I say anything about it? It is obnioxiously constant. Always pulling the D%^% phone out to see who emailed or what is going on in Facebook. Just so RUDE. I want to shake her, and wake her up.
I know how you feel. My W is the same. So wrapped up in her own, selfish little life. No Father's Day card from my daughter, either. BlkBerry Messenger all day. It appears she dumped her Yahoo acount and everything is Berry now. She also dropped her FB acct (I could see it, IMO). And I want to yell the same things. WAKE UP! READ A BOOK! OPEN YOUR EYES! THINK FOR ONE MINUTE! I don't know what to tell you or do other than to tryto GAL and convince yourself that you can; will and MUST be happy without her. It will only be when she sees and, more importantly, FEELS that YOU are gone from her that she may start to figure it out. I'm deep in the mud with my W (suspected A) so I am just trying to get control of me 'cause it's all I can control or change. And it only takes one person to change what they're doing and "the dance HAS to change"
Thanks Callasdad...Good to know others are going through this. Facebook is the source of all EVIL!!!!
I am so tired of the her contantly getting mad over little crap. Tired of the walking on eggshells, worried if you will say the wrong thing and set her off. Just tired of all of this!!! If she keeps yelling at my S, I am going to tell her to get out. I am beginning to resent her for what she is doing to him and me. She needs psicological help, BADLY. How can bring this up to her without offending her or setting us back? Although at this point, not sure if I care if she leaves. Is this how LBS should feel? I am tired of acting like everythnig is fine to come home and go to bed in seperate bedrooms and no affection. Also, knowing that if you ask what is going on, the answer still is that ILYBNILWY is the answer. How do you GAL while living under the same roof? How do you get mysterious while under the same roof?
Hopping to hear from you Sandi or Coach, I know you are busy, but you really help me out a lot. But do not ONLY want to hear from them, all opinions welcome and appreciated!!!!
Well, I'm not Sandi or Coach, I know that much. We too are in separate rooms under the same roof. Sadly, it's been like this almost a year. It started as a 'sleep with D till she's used to her big, girl bed" Now ou D can't sleep alone. Wasn't good for D or the M.
As far as eggshells, I know that feeling but I'm not getting the fighting at home. I've got other games, I think. I'd defer to Sandi/Greek/Coach/Puppy etc. My opinion and what I've tried to do is make sure D is looked after and entertained; do my own stuff (laundry, etc) and speak when asked to. I initiate nothing unless it pertains to D. I just deal with my stuff. And try to stay content and involved inmy own stuff.
If she starts going where I don't want to go, I stop looking her in the eye. I give it a minute. If it doesn't change, I apologize and excuse myself for 'something'
It seems to be working (for me) as we don't really have any hostility. But that's not to say it won't happen. I'mguessing it may if we get closer to Sep or Div. Right now we're sort of limbo. The only thing that drives me crazy is that if we could have related like this 2 months ago, we'd wouldn't be considering divorce as "today" is better than two months ago. But NOW we're talkin D? Makes no sense.
Callasdad and SMM23, I hear you. Between Facebook and the d...ed Blackberry, I felt like I was living with a ghost for the last few months before our separation (he left). Sometimes, social networking is anything BUT a good thing.
Everything has to be an abbreviation and a cliche.
So boring. Words lose their meaning bc they are misused/slanged.
You even see the detachment from the constant emailon the job. People have devised ways to "hide" behind email.
Ridiculous. All the anonymity and secrecy is damaging society. If yoy don't have enough to write to do an letter, leave it or phone it in. there won't be a chance for "I don't like the tone of your font"
I get you, Callasdad ... I so despise what Facebook and its ilk are doing in this regard. There's a place for stuff like that, but I think it's being abused by people who are looking for easy ways out and cheap validation.
Conversation and real communication is being replaced by sound bites; 'headlines/quips; and one-liners.
Put a teenager around a campfire and they're useless. They don't now how to start a simple chat about nothing in order to work into 'something'. It's amazing where conversation can go if you let it. But it needs 5 minutes.
Hey, that's OK. I understand. I vent to myself a dozen times a day if I can't vent here -- it's all so maddening. Since my bomb was dropped, I'm doing better, but my latest feeling is an overwhelming sense of betrayal: having to deal with a sudden WAS JUST ISN'T RIGHT.
I'm venting too (gotta do that sometimes). There's just something SO wrong about a spouse deciding to walk away when there are young children involved and there are no acute problems in the marriage (ie, abuse, addiction, etc.)
