how do i keep my cool?

[xin]

When I found out about my husband EA, about 6 mths ago, he asked for a separation. I hanged on for 3 mths but gave in finally as it was hurting too much to stay. After being away for 3 mths, I asked to come home saying i couldn't get a job where i was and needed to try around here. My plan is to stay and start DB'ing. My husband didn't protest when i said i was coming back, but when he saw how much i have brought with me, he kept asking what my plan was and he said he hoped i wasn't planning to come back to stay. I know i should stay calm and not lose my cool, but how do i do that when he seemed to want me gone evey minute of the day?
We just had a fight and i said a whole heap of mean things to him. How do i stop this from happening again?