Confused Today Part II............... ran out of editing time on the original post.
Yesterday she told me she would appreciate whatever help I could offer her , such as getting her truck insured, keeping her cell turned on, etc. We dont have anything more then an informal verbal agreement regarding not paying each other child support, and I admit Im concerned that if she gets pissy she might decide to go for it in court, which is notoriously unfair as far as amounts go. Her uncle just got slapped with over $600 a MONTH in support, essentially half a months pay. And the Courts NEVER want to hear anything about " how am I supposed to live ?" The canned response is " get another part time job to make up the difference" knowing full well that as soon as your income goes up more, they'll simply haul you back into the judge to extract more from you.
But part of me also feels like taking a stand, as politely as possible and point out that her vehicle/financial situation are no longer my concern or responsibility and point her towards the OM that she just had leave for to fulfill her needs. But, that could actually backfire on me, since she feels a powerful need to be " taken care of ". I really dont have a clue exactly how much he makes but its close to my income, he's certainly not rolling in dough by any means. The biggest advantage he has financially is that his place is free and clear except for taxes and utilities.
She actually said yesterday that she DOES want my help, but is afraid I'll " hold it over her head". Trying like hell to figure out the line between being supportive and forcing her to deal with the consequences of HER choice to walk, but Im not even sure in her FOG that she'll realize it for what it is, HER choice that SHE made that has consequences she didnt anticipate and that might make her wake up to the fact that despite my flaws maybe I wasnt such a bad choice after all.
