Who knows why she invited you! She's in 50 different directions. You are in ONE direction - being the best man and father you can be. She's either on board or not. Either way, you are fine.
It might be guilt. Glad you didn't accommodate her.
Get dark and stay dark. Be mysterious. Do you have the little guy tomorrow? If so, take him out for the day - maybe a day trip that keeps you out of the house and out of pocket for the entire day. She can wonder where you are. You'll be enjoying yourself with your little man.
Greek
Me45 H46 T25 M22 S21 & 19 D13 Separated and filed 8/08 Moved home 11/08
I actually had no intentions on bringing up OM. I figured we are finished what's the point. I just don't want to even argue with her anymore, if that makes sense.
So something confusing just happened. I had my son all day today and I have to work tomorrow so I won't see him until W is back from dinner. She sent me a text if she can bring our son to the dinner. I told her that won't be a problem I'll see him when I get home. She followed with this line "Are we making a mistake"?
I asked what mistake? she said "This......Divorce". I replied with "I wish I knew, I really do".....
I'm not sure what this means or why she would bring it up. I think she is getting nervous about the outcome. I'm in a position to purchase our home so she can move out and move on. I've spoken to the right people and I'm ready to go, just need to move some money around and hopefully in a few months I can take care of this.
I guess I'll have to wait and see what comes next from this roller coaster ride.
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
So something confusing just happened. I had my son all day today and I have to work tomorrow so I won't see him until W is back from dinner. She sent me a text if she can bring our son to the dinner. I told her that won't be a problem I'll see him when I get home. She followed with this line "Are we making a mistake"?
I asked what mistake? she said "This......Divorce". I replied with "I wish I knew, I really do".....
I think you missed a golden opportunity here, FFH. I would have liked to have seen you respond something like "I understand what you're saying, and I can only speak for myself. I can honestly say that everything I've done, I've done to try to fight for my marriage and my family. I never wanted a divorce (still don't), but I will sleep well knowing I was faithful, and I didn't cut and run from "us," and chose instead to fight for our marriage."
This morning I have to work and I was waiting for my W to return from her evening out. Still have no idea where she goes, I don't even ask anymore.
As soon as she walked in the door she sat down and wanted to ask me a question and to wanted me to promise not to get upset. She then proceeded to ask me about my day yesterday with my son.
Long story short, I bought 3 tickets to this event. I decided after finding out that W was talking again with OM I wanted to go alone with son. She had asked me to save the 3rd ticket for his scrapbook. I took it with me anyway and ended up giving it to a family who needed an extra ticket.
It felt great doing something nice like that. Anyway, my W called me to ask how the day went. I told her I was able to get rid of that ticket. This morning she asked if I took a female with me???? I told her that I wouln't bring strange women around my son at this time.
I left for work and couldn't help what is going through her mind???? Any ideas???
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
It felt great doing something nice like that. Anyway, my W called me to ask how the day went. I told her I was able to get rid of that ticket. This morning she asked if I took a female with me???? I told her that I wouln't bring strange women around my son at this time.
I left for work and couldn't help what is going through her mind???? Any ideas???
Yeah -- she's feeling you slipping away. KEEP IT UP!!!!
GREAT ANSWER, btw (notice you didn't say you wouldn't date, only that you "wouldn't bring anyone strange around our son." Perfect. And GREAT JOB doing with that ticket what YOU wanted to do with it!!
Now is the time for my famous admonition: DON'T GO ALL "MELTY MAN" ON HER NOW! Stay aloof; strong; confident; positive.
It's funny... I started to feel good that maybe my W is realizing what she is missing and things could actually work out. Then I look at those damn phone records and just an hour ago she had a 15 min conversation with OM.
I noticed they didn't talk all night which indicates maybe they were together. Can't proove anything but my gut tells me that. These types of findings keep me on the path to D. I just don't know how you can forgive something like this.
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
It doesn't work in a straight line, FFH. "Fits and starts" is more the way they "snap out of it," if in fact they do.
Waywards -- especially wayward women -- are like those circus acts that used to come out on the old Ed Sullivan Show, or Bozo's Circus. Remember the guy that would try to keep multlple plates spinning, on multiple sticks? Well, a wayward woman will have two (or more) plates spinning -- her husband, and OM. When she feels one slowing down, and starting to wobble (like she's losing you), will will pay it attention to get it spinning fast and straight again. This "attention" can take the form of being nice, sending chatting TMs, initiating sex, or even negative attention like an angry outburst meant to control you if you've shown a history of being intimidated by such behavior.
It's funny... I started to feel good that maybe my W is realizing what she is missing and things could actually work out. Then I look at those damn phone records and just an hour ago she had a 15 min conversation with OM.
Less than FIVE DAYS before my wife begged me back, saying things like "I love you . . . I've ALWAYS loved you" and "You're my home!", she was texting OM with "No one does it for me like you do" and "I love you."
Her brain's a mess right now, FFH. Physiologically/chemically, she's an inconsistent mess of raging PEAs.
My W just called me at work and said soemthing wasn't sitting well with our conversation this morning. She accused me of bringing another women around our son during this event. I once again assured her that I wouldn't bring anyone around our son until I was sure about them.
We somehow started talking about our R. I tried to factor in the "script" i was provided a few days ago but it didn't go well. She said she doesn't care how I feel anymore and she insists that OM is a friend and he makes her feel better she is feeling down about us.
We talked about the D again and the house. Amazing how hot and cold she is. Almost like she knows when I'm finally starting to feel better about myself and situation.
M: 36 W: 29 S: 2.5 EA: 2/2010 OM1 D Bomb: 3/2010 PA: 6/2010 OM2 W moved out 8/2010 Loc: DE, USA
