Heartbroken and needing help!

[irishblessings]

Thanks to Trusting, SA, Cat, and Glam - your posts helped me through the day!
Late last night, H texts me and asks if he can stop by to talk briefly and to see S. Texted back that S was out with a friend. Then H calls me - can he come by. I said I didn't think so. Said he wanted to talk about details for today and tomorrow. Said I didn't think it was necessary and that I would see him at the games.
Went to the games - stayed removed from him / at the end of the day as I'm driving home he texts me and asks me what mine and S's plans are. I said that S was coming home and then we would be deciding. Then he texts - "Will you let me know when you know? If you don't want me around that's fine - I will talk on the phone with him later."!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I replied that I would talk to S.
I am pleased with myself as to how I handled these things. I keep trying to avoid reading anything into these mixed messages - and I do not want to put myself in a position to have poison dumped on me again. I can be amicable and civil - but I don't want to be buddies!
I am also trying to figure out how far into the Replay stage he is. I think all of this began right around age 41 (the anger). Then the phone calls and hookups began about 2 years ago. He disclosed this stuff at 46 - than a month later ILYBNILWY!
Not that I'm trying to see how much longer there is to go in this - I'm just trying to get a sense of where I am in the journey.
Thanks for listening!