She knows the twins (15) from her and the ex have significant emotional problems as a result of WAW previous relationship. I simply CANNOT believe that she would knowingly and willingly put DD through anything like that intentionally. She really is acting "possessed" and doesnt seem to even be able to stop herself.
I also realize the anger is a manifestation of guilt. Since Im DBing like crazy and validating everything she says, she's royaly pissed that Im taking away her ammunition to walk with a clean conscience. She said today that " you havent been there for DD for 5 years !! And NOW all of a sudden you want to be ??"
She seems to have convinced herself that I would have or should have just let her and the kids walk away, inspite of all of my calm validation, she is taking my changes NOT as a sincere wakeup call and determination to do everything I should have been, but as nothing more then an attempt to " screw her " somehow out of her "plan"
I KNOW she will NOT get or ask for ANY help for herself, she NEVER has. But she lies and fakes so well there doesnt seem to be a single person that can or will "shake her " and say " Look at what your doing !!!" Which only feeds into her denial. I dont even know what damage has been done to DD so far, and I can only thank god that our son is so little ( 8 mos) that he wont be effected by whats going on right now.
Im starting to think I made a big mistake agreeing to her having primary custody during the school year. Having her scream the things and threats towards me as she has done in front of DD is certainly NOT my definition of a " good mother "
