When someone starts acting completely out of character, like during an affair or MLC, it's because their Freddy has taken over their bodies. It's NOT them; it's their BAD them.
The problem is, you can't spank or give your spouse a time out to try to suppress their BAD them - you have to get smarter and much more creative in order to outwit their Freddy (unless you consider a 180 a MAJOR time out! LOL!).
So next time your WS acts like a spoiled brat, remember it's their BAD them - they've entered {WS's name} -and try not to take it too personally...
I don't know Red. I think ownship of one's behavior at all times is essential. I can not see excusing behavior for a MLC, etc. I am not a fan of the "devil made me do it" excuse, IMO.... Esp. when the offense is very grevious.
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
