How to tell the kids

[dday101798]

Stop these conversations right now!

Do not discuss what you think you will or will not have or get or offer her in a D. EVER. By doing so, you are standing over a blazing firepit and dumpring 5 gallons of gas out of bucket on it.

Simply, "you want a divorce, you want to be done with me, you want someone else, then leave". "I'm sorry for what I have done or lack therof to bring things to this point that you see no other way, but if that is what you want, than it's best you leave". And not even in an angerly tone either, just a stern but compassionate and standing your ground for what remains of your family.

Reality check for you. I fought tooth and nail. My D got VERY nasty, she "abducted" our kids and withehld them from me. She sat IN THE COURT ROOM WITH OM! I proved each and every one of her claims false. Numerous police reports against me, all bullarchy and dismissed. Yet, I still ended up a 72 hour a month father! Do you want that? Discuss zero legalities directly with her. If she is to move out, then the children ARE NOT to leave the house without a joint parenting agreement (JPA) in place!!!! No joke!!!! As far as I'm concerned right now. You may not see them again after this trip they are on now.

I don't say this to be mean or belittle your W. You and I both know, you love her very much and want this insanity to stop 100 times faster than the millisecond it "got started".

However, you really need to pay attention and VALIDATE what she is telling you. You now have 2 days worth of posts where she placing in your hands everything you have done wrong, your convictions. Stop being so defensive! Defending your faults is only making it worse.

I'm also highly disturbed on your childrens comments and hope you gave them huge hugs and kisses and let them know you love them and it will be ok. I wasn't the greatest dad on earth either, one of my convictions. Be the better person and protect them from this. And at all costs, do not discuss this with them. I might also install family counseling in the JPA should one become neccessary.