NO! Your wife is having at least a EA. Is this current guy the same one from '08?
You need to bust this affair, earn your wife's respect back and kill the boredom in your marriage.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.