Had an interesting talk yesterday with WW about trust...hold your 2x4's as I don't consider it R talk. We are both in agreement that we need to start learning to trust each other again for the M to even stand a chance of reconciling. I told WW it's not that I want a detailed accounting or where she is at all times or that I'm going to check her phone/computer daily, it's the perception that WW is hiding things from me. She made reference to me treating her how a Dad treats a child and how her Dad would treat her. Again, "controlling" and she has a real problem with that. I told her that people don't keep secrets in marriage. WW has many issues with her Dad that have spilled over into our M and lately she has been equating me to her dad.
WW said that she loves me and cares about me but doesn't know if she will ever be "in love" with me again. Once again I tried to explain that "in love" wears off after a while and that love is many things. I told WW I don't know if I would ever be "in love" with her again either. I also explained that I don't really believe in "fairy tail" love/marriage and that is not my expectation...my only expectation is...wait for it...wait for it...COMMITMENT! WW also mentioned D as a way her and I could start with a clean slate and no expectations...Huh?
WW also said that she is 50/50 on whether our M will survive...actually I'm of the same opinion and mindset.
WW is also taking the consequence of crossing my boundary very serious as she mentioned that she needs to get her business going so she has income if we D.
When WW was expressing her feelings, I simply replied "I understand"...a real 180 for me as in the past I would argue her feelings to try and change her way of thinking which I've learned is a huge no no.
Played with DD's at the park and afterward WW asked me to stay for dinner.
Last edited by loweinsd51; 06/18/1002:05 PM.
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
