Okay FTR if I ever hit the powerball I am investment in bio research to come up with a pill to stop the cycling….hell the more I think of it…I think a “counter MLC” might be better. LOL
No you won't. Even though this is hard, sometimes it really sucks, it is an important journey for us to go on...
While I wouldn't wish this on anyone, I wouldn't want to take it away from someone either.
I know for a fact, if I had been able to avoid it in any way...
I wouldn't be the Cat that you know and love
Originally Posted By: Ericmsant
Originally Posted By: Mach1
What are you doing for YOU....
You hit the nail on the head as usual. What am I doing for me…We’ll let me see how I can answer that…Right now, my first priority are the kids (and I know you did not want to hear that). Unfortunately, she is never really home much so I find myself doing almost everything with the kids, which does not leave much time for me. About the only thing that I do for me is read, post and shoot the shiznit on the phone. I was gonna go out tonight with some friends from work but the kids called that they were hungry, so I rushed home to cook. I made the plan tonight because Wed is her day off. I guess I should have known better…the last few Wednesday’s she is usually out. I am going to try and hang out on the 4th of July and have some fun. Okay…I’m ready for the 2x4 now.
Ok you made the excuse. So now, let's do it with no more excuses.
E,
Even when my H was present in our lives, because of our schedules, I was essentially a single mom. I allowed that to be an excuse to not do things. Because I was doing for S. Always. I didn't recognize what my friends said as true, I just thought that they were not dedicated enough mothers.
I was wrong (OMG, check to see if the sky is falling down around you...:) )
You HAVE to take care of Eric. One day a week, one day every two weeks, just commit to something a little regular. If that means you get a baby sitter, or let the older ones take care of your D, then that is the way it goes.
Even if it is a few hours to go sit at a movie by yourself, a drive up to the top of Talcott mountain to walk back down the hiking path, to sit where the hanggliders jump off from and just look at the beauty, a cup of coffee and your laptop at starbucks. It doesn't have to be a party every night. Just some adult time.
You can't be the best Dad, if you aren't taking care of the Dad first.
Originally Posted By: Ericmsant
I’m trying to do the best that I can and I guess I expected a little help. Therein lies my problem. I expected something from her. I expected her to think a little more logically.
This, and how you have been feeling, is why we say no expectations. You acknowledged that this woman is not even someone you know. So you really can't expect anything from her anyway...
Secret? Even when you know someone really well, you should not expect things from them. Expectations take away the surprises and the things that make you smile, and they also can lead to disappointment on occassion.
Expectations allow you to no longer appreciate what you first appreciated about someone, they allow you to take people for granted.
That is one of the lessons we learn through this even though it is a very little talked about one.
Have a good day E.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
