Allen there is one other thing I notice, and don't know if it is a male/female thing or a personality thing...
I see Marie mention a fear, "What if he reaches out to me, and I don't respond, so then he pulls away forever because I wasn't there for him?"
I think that is something a lot of us ladies (and perhaps gentlemen too) have worried about at one point or another. With the man/boy who cries wolf, there is a tendency to fear, "What if THIS time he really meant it, and I wasn't there for him?" However I have to believe that if they wanted that connection badly enough, our ignoring them would not drive them away. After all, in any other area of our lives, if we want something bad enough, we keep striving for it, don't we?? ACTIONS, not just words...
It's all in teh post from Penny I put up earlier Bobbi... this is counter intuitive, but the more you pull away the more he's doing to want you... you have to trust the process...
most people find the pursuit an indicator that he's ready to work on things and dive to pick up the crumb... Only to find that he was NOT READY to RETURN YET...
Each time you pick up that crumb he runs off into his fox hole again and hides... with a nice ego stroke to boot.. and you feeling miserable
You have to keep pulling away and trust the process... wait for the pursuit to be so strong that it drives him to END the AFFAIR
