One last thing: how did your husband get you talking again? My concern is that all of these leading emails of late, after weeks of not seeing one another, in which he was trying to get me to talk with him, *might have been his attempt to open up communications* - and I blew it. He is shy - I keep thinking it must have been hard for him to have kept writing when I didn't really answer him except for the bare minimum response and didn't answer all of his questions, but he kept writing. And on Thursday he wrote he missed me and signed it, "Love, [his name]." I wonder if these emails and Thursday's letter WERE his attempt to talk...
Try not to fall into this trap! I have done it myself...sadly, more than once...
My now ex-H still does it from time to time. I will get random texts, "my life sucks and is a f@cking disaster"..."the way I am living now I would rather be dead"...some more leading, like just the other night he sent me "sorry"...I replied with "?" and he said "the sorry is for everything"...
However in past instances when he says or does things like this--during one heated discussion over telling the kids our D was official, he said "I still think about us getting back together every day", I have bitten onto the bait. After that exchange, I later texted, "Did you mean it when you said you think about us getting back together?" Guess what? NO RESPONSE from him...
Another time he said he hated the idea of getting a D and didn't want one. I pushed and asked if that meant he wanted to stop the D...guess what? NO RESPONSE
My IC has told me to stop putting out feelers when he has these moments where he feels the need to share with me, it just reinforces for him that I am here waiting in the wings if/when he feels like being a grownup, responsible man again. Kind of like when your kids are outside playing, once in awhile they pop in to make sure you are still there and then off they go again...
Sorry for the ramble just want to keep others from making the mistakes I made!!
