Quote:

I do believe there are people here and elsewhere who stand longer than they should. Longer than what is healthy.


I know I feel this way. I DO agree with aspects of Braveheart's , our idea's are NOT that different.

I just do not see it as my place to decide when someone should not stand or how long IS too long...conversely...and perhaps hypocritically I'll tell someone that 2 months is too short a time. However, that is more of defense of DBing, and the idea that the person who gave it two months DID NOT in fact DB.

I also have a problem with being able to say...GENERALLY...that there are people here who stood too long...but we lack the courage to say that directly to them? We hide behind generalizations...but BUT...I am glad that we do not actually tell a person directly to give up hope. How dare we do that.

Even I am not THAT callous, and you know what? It is not my place, nor should it be anyone elses.

A person I feel is stuck? I'll try to help NOT by saying, "Time is up! You need to go date now, your husband is boinking the seceratry and the guy in PR." But with themselves. A Person who is CAPABLE of living without their spouse is the person who is ABLE to move on without regrets.

What is the reality of 'standing'? It is different for you as it is for me, because MY perception and MY experience forms MY reality. Just as yours does for you.

So my reality of standing differs from Cat's, Machs, Grits, trapts, Brooklyns, BrandNewDays, Bravehearts...ALL different.

Braveheart is not bitter...I am not sure he has totally forgiven his X...but then I'm not sure I have 100% forgiven my wife at times based upon what I write I am sure that many of you wonder that as well. I'd say it is mostly most forgiven...but talking about the past always has ramnifications for me as well.



Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis

Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans

Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK

TRUST THE PROCESS - Cadet